I am not the most hands on mom out there. I’m not one that spends a lot of time in the playroom playing or doing dress up or playing with dolls. I will do the occasional puzzle and board game but that is really the extent of it. Mainly I think its because my imagination no longer works the way hers does and I get bored easily.
But, my imagination is still very much alive. I would be lying if I didn’t say I spend hours a day daydreaming and playing out stories and scenes in my mind everyday. Recently, as Alexa and I were sitting outside trying to soak in crisp spring air and be rewarmed by the new spring sun, we sat down to read a book. Her choice that day was a book about fairies, and funny enough this fairy’s job was to welcome in spring and help the world re-awaken with the new life and light it brings. After we were finished she said, I love fairies, I wish I could be one. At first I just sat there. I’ll be honest, I was tired. I had spent most of the day cleaning and organizing and was enjoying just lounging around. My romantic heartstrings started to pull and before I could catch myself I said, “Do you want to pretend you are a fairy today? Mommy has a very special dress she bought and I think it would be perfect and we could go find a magical spot and maybe do some fairy pictures?” She thought about it and said, “no”. I wondered why she had said that, and said, “Come on, let’s go, it will be fun!” And with my excitement, she felt it and jumped up excitedly to play. We got up, scurried around the house and got ready.
As we walked to a spot on our property that compelled and called to me with soft moss, fresh young grass, peeling tree bark and pockets of light that angelically lit up anything caught within its grasp, camera by my side, I started to dream with my daughter. At first I started to talk and just use my voice but it wasn’t enough, so leaving judgement and inhibition behind, I frolicked in the area like a fairy, and with each step and turn and twirl she giggled and laughed and her joy and exhilaration echoed through the trees. Slowly, the veil of reality lifted and she transformed into what her imagination believed to be a fairy. As I watched, gently guiding direction here and there, my hands on my camera, which has for me become an extension of my heart that allows me to capture how my soul sees the world, started to work its magic; I was changing settings and moving in an almost magical way to not miss a single flutter or twirl.
We changed from scene to scene and danced and played. The soft dirt on her delicate little feet made my heart swoon as it reminded me so much of myself and the joy I find in being barefoot and solidly connecting with the earth. Her messy hair that I find myself battling on sleepy school mornings but is so her softly illuminated by light or “fairy dust”. Those petite little arms and legs that look so delicate and moved so effortlessly but carried behind it a strong power of the incredible force that she is propelled her little body effortlessly. I realized, while I watched her, that she embodies everything my Romantic heart has ever wished for in my life and in a child. Strength, grace, joy and beauty all packaged tightly with a fiery spirit and drive, much how I wish to see myself someday.
I thought about this gift that I was so fortunate to find within myself, the ability to put into physical form the way my heart sees the world. And while many times my heart sees the side of courage that can be so raw and real, or streaks of independence that challenge and evoke the spirit; what has always been shining so brightly is my romantic heart. Through light, emotion, love and a bit of whimsy I am a dreamer and without dreaming I wouldn’t be able to do what I do.
So while I adore my daughter learning life skills and the power she will receive by excelling at math, science, and reading that she learns in school, I want to encourage her to keep dreaming. I want her Romantic heart to grow and blossom and develop just as strongly as these other skills, because that will open up an even larger world of opportunity for her to excel.
Dreamers. People who can see the world from a different point of view, who see light when all others see darkness and can find joy and pleasure in just the simplest of moment. Dreamers are people who are changing our world everyday and I want to encourage her to develop and embrace that because its just as important as any of the other skills.
I will continue to dream with her in the way I know how. I find Joy in working with other mothers who want to do that same with their children. I’m lucky to do this everyday. I want to remember the beauty and power of imagination of my daughter at this age so 20 years from now, one or many of these images will be on my wall as a reminder of the true way I see her through my heart.
I believe in Love at first sight- I met my husband on his 18th birthday and the rest is history
I’m passionate about a women’s right to birth without fear or pressure whether that is at home or in a hospital, I’ve done it in both places.
I have two beautiful girls, Alexa and Arya, 5.5 years apart. I believe each of my daughters was sent to me to remind me of a piece of myself I have lost along the way, it has been exciting journey to rekindle those parts of “ME” again.
We live on a little River in Southbury, CT with our Rotti Beagle mix, a Crazy 1 year old German Shephard and a fat cat that won’t leave the basement, he might be to fat to climb the stairs.
I love a good margarita on the rocks with Salt but ONLY if my husband makes it with hand squeezed lemons, limes and homemade simple syrup, any other margarita sucks.
I listen to “pitbull” in the car with my daughters, they have no idea who Raffi is but Alexa knows most of the words to “Calle Ocho”
I’m the girl who will love you fiercely but is not afraid to “tell you like it is”, if I do, it means I actually care about you!
I love my girls but there are many days I don’t like them or want to be around them. Yep, I just said that, its normal for you to feel that too!
I believe that mothers a given a handbook when their baby is born, its called “intuition” and it will never lead her astray.
I am a photographer who helps women “Celebrate the Courageous journey of motherhood”