The Yes Woman Exposed

Do you like to say Yes to everyone all the time?
You have clients that take up a lot of your time and don’t pay you enough for it?
You have clients that email you every day about every little problem they’re having?
You’re tired, falling asleep at your computer but you’ve got to finish that client project?
You even agree to help out in your child’s classroom the same day you have a hundred other errands to run?

If you said Yes to any of these. I’m sorry, but you’re a Yes Woman. If the most obnoxious person you’ve ever met came to you and wanted to work with you, you’d say Yes. Even though you hate them and they’re annoying. If that person that coorects every speeling mitsake in your emails or Face Book posts aks to wok with you, youd say Yus.

Yes Woman

Yes Woman

If a website designer, a mechanic, and a restaurant owner came asking to work with you, you’d say yes to all of them.
But why? Because you want or need the money?

Let me tell you something. By saying yes to these people, you are denying yourself your freedom. By saying yes to the undesirables, you’re not leaving room for the desirables. Even the fact that these people are coming to you for help screams insanity. So, how do you stop being a “Yes Woman” and what are you meant to do instead? I mean, you still need clients, that’s not going to change. But what you need is ideal clients.

What are ideal clients?

Ideal clients are the desirables. The people that don’t care if you can’t spell (unless you were hired to proofread, then of course, you’d need to know how to spell). That have the same values as you. That like the same things you like. That have a similar vision of the world as you. You know, the people that are easy to work with. Instead of getting annoyed when you see their name pop up in your inbox, you get excited because you know that the reason they’re emailing you is because they want to share their results with you, or thank you, or book in for extra sessions. These are the people you want to say Yes to.

To everyone else? Give them a simple No and send them on their way (or you can be nice and refer someone else, unless they’re rude to you. In that case, a “get lost” will suffice).

Why can’t I say Yes to everyone?

No one can serve every type of person and help all of them get amazing results. If you’re going to target everyone, either your clients are going to lose out, or you’re going to lose out. Or both.

For example – if you’re a health coach that wants to help all the people in the world get healthy and you accept everyone into your programs, you’re not going to be able to get really specific in helping your clients problems.

Some may have a problem with overeating, some with not eating enough. Then others will have problems with exercising. Then others may be pregnant and want to keep a healthy weight throughout their pregnancy, whereas others may be anorexic. Then again, some people like to learn in different ways. There’s one on one, group workshops, online lessons, phone coaching, video, email lessons. A step further, there are different personalities – people that want everything done for them, people that are know-it-alls, people that don’t like to know they have a problem, people that like contact with you every day. To serve them effectively you’ll need to create a custom program or service for each person. There is no way you can help each of these people effectively. You either need to have 40 extra hours in the day, or not have a life outside of serving these clients.

How do I find these “ideal clients”?

Before you go looking for these desirable clients, you first need to get clear and discover who your ideal client actually is. You need to get to know everything about them.

Getting to know who your ideal client is is a bit like dating. You have to know what the other person is interested in, what their goals are, what work they do, what their pet peeves are… The list goes on. You have to determine if this person is the right one for you. If you’re a good match.

Once you’ve done all that, all of your marketing – from your website to your Facebook posts should all reflect your ideal client. Everything should be speaking directly to them. When you’ve done this, it won’t be long at all until you’re attracting and saying Yes to your ideal clients. And of those annoying undesirables? They’re off bugging your competition.

Phillipa Kiripatea

Phillipa Kiripatea is a marketing coach for entrepreneurs who love to dream big. Through her free mastermind group, The League of Women Who #DreamBig she inspires and motivates women to dream bigger and to make their big dreams a reality.

Phillipa believes in enlightened connection and speaking your truth. She hates small talk. Loves vulnerability.

She's also a single mother to 3 boys and does not have all her shit together.

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