Almost everyone who has ever done it will tell you it’s one of the worst things ever! They will swear they will never do it again. They are shocked their marriage survived it. Moving! It’s the absolute worst. My routine is off, I’m cranky, I’m living among taped up boxes labeled with a sharpie until I can muster up the strength to unpack them all and find proper homes for my stuff.
I have to come to terms that I either donated, threw out or sold for mere pennies items of high value that I knew I could no longer use. They call this purging, I hear. Everyone told me to “let it go!” All of the nick knacks, wedding gifts and souvenirs of my first marriage – gone! Many of my daughter’s books and toys from when she was a toddler – gone, my favorite wall decor, memories, even old photos – gone! I had to gut my home where I raised my daughter almost entirely by myself in less than a week.
I had no time to be emotional, I had a house to empty. I was worried about how my daughter would feel going through 8 years of her things and I told her to narrow an entire playroom and bedroom to 3 boxes. She happily donated 80% of her items. She surprised me with her willingness to purge with me. We smiled as we recalled fond memories of toys and looked through old photos. Her cherished Care Bears were neatly placed in a box to donate even though at one time she couldn’t part with them. Books that were the only thing she begged me to read over and over until she finally fell asleep were stacked in a pile to let other children enjoy.
But guess what? I want to be sad. I want to be mad, but I’m not. Those who told me to simply get rid of everything that wasn’t essential no matter how much I loved it were indeed correct. I felt a huge burden lifted off of me. I felt free. Free to make new memories with my soon-to-be husband. We get to pick out our own wall decor and dishes. That $200 Waterford crystal bowl that never was used once? I gave it away for free. It felt good! And what’s even cooler is that I am moving to my childhood home. So my daughter will be raised where I was, with a huge yard, big bedroom and lots more space for her step brothers.
So, this move, as stressful and awful as it is, when the dust settles will be exciting, yet comforting at the same time. We are in transition. We are ready for Change. We welcome all of the wonderful things our new life will bring us. However, I am not moving again until we retire to Florida or if someone comes up with a magic spell to box, wrap, carry and sort stuff while I’m tanning. Case closed!
Veronica is an accomplished author and her first book "Dialogue 3" was published in 2002 and showcases her photographs of people and places and the tragedy of 911. She is currently a continuing education photography teacher at Brookdale Community College instructing courses from beginner DSLR to more advanced portraiture courses and also hosts workshops around the state to amateur and hobbyist photographers.
She has been interviewed on several radio talk shows, featured on blogs and her work has been on several reality TV shows such as TLC's Four Weddings, Bravo's Cake Boss, HGTV's Dina's Party and The Real Housewives of NJ.
Veronica is currently speaking in the tri-state area on photography and how women can build their confidence in photographs. She instructs women how to pose better, and sell their brand with a perfect head shot.
Since beginning her professional career in 1996 as a photojournalist, Veronica has won many awards for her portraiture work. She worked for some of the top media outlets in the tri-state area such as The Star Ledger, The New York Times and the Associated Press.
Latest posts by Veronica Yankowski (see all)
- The Million Man March, A Reflection 20 Years Later - October 16, 2015
- How To Feel Good About Yourself When You Don’t Feel Good About Yourself - October 8, 2015
- The Center of My World - July 21, 2015